Monday, June 4, 2012

Are you holding on too tight?


This comes to me via Steve Mattus, another blogger that I follow....



You’re trying so hard to reach your goals.  Maybe you’re trying to grow your business, trying diligently to acquire new clients.  Perhaps you’re trying to save your marriage.  Maybe you’re looking to fall in love.  Maybe you’re trying to get the kids to school on time or trying to keep the laundry up.  Or, like many, maybe you’re trying to get in shape, lose weight, or get that elusive six-pack.
How’s it going?
You may feel like, despite all the best efforts, regardless of all the trying, even with all the heart and soul you’ve put into it…  the business is generating half the revenue you need, there are far too few new clients, the marriage is failing, you haven’t found love, the kids are late, the laundry is behind, you’re overweight.
Okay… it’s probably not that bad.  But at least one of those is probably true for you.
All you want is for it to be fixed.  You see other people getting what you want.  You think to yourself, “They are awesome, sure, but so am I.  They’re deserving, sure!  But so am I.”  And yet, you feel like you’re not getting what you want.  You’ve tried the best practices.  You’ve researched what others have done, and you’ve tried the tricks, read the highest rated books, utilized all the time-management tools you can think of, and joined the gym, done the diet, even did a colon cleanse in an effort to get some kind of a result.  (That last one worked, by the way… you were in the bathroom for what seemed like days.  Not exactly the “result” you were hoping for.  I get it.)
It's not working. You try and try. And still... It's not working.

This might be a curveball…. but… What if you’re holding on too tight?  What if you’ve got your eyes set on a goal that isn’t actually what you want?
Do you need to let go?
What would happen if you were able to let go of the idea of achieving that goal?
What if that goal wasn’t what you really wanted?  What if you really wanted something else?  What could that be?  How do you tell?
Ask yourself, “If I _____________ (fill in the blank with your goal), what would be different?”
The answer to that question is more likely what you really want.

As long as you're holding tightly to your current goal... you narrow the opportunities to get it.
Letting go is so incredibly difficult.  Doing so frees us in amazing ways.
Let go of narrow goals to achieve things that won’t get you what you really want.
Let go of beliefs that aren’t true.
Let go of holding only one perspective.
Let go of being right.
Let go of having to know.
Let go of being secure all the time.
Letting go means getting curious.  And true curiosity is a tool that will take you to places you haven’t even imagined yet.
Hold on just like a baby…  gently.  And let go like a baby… easily.  Look at the world in wonderment.

What do you need to let go of?


For more from Steve, check out http://actualinfinity.com/

6 comments:

Jim said...

Letting go......feeling I have to be in control.

Ms Sparrow said...

I'd have a hard time of letting go of having to know. I'm always searching for information on where we came from, what happened back then, how and where does it all end, who else is out there in the universe and how is it possible that the universe even exists? To tell you the truth, it drives me crazy but I'll never stop needing to know.

Stew said...

That's a difficult one for myself as well, Jim.

Stew said...

I like the way you think.
I found though, that the less you think about it, the easier the answers are. I really don't believe it's as complicated as we tend to make it.
But who can resist a good story from the past. And I've set my mind free to accept anything about the future. Anything.

laurak@forestwalkart said...

hmmmm...letting go...of the past...things that hurt...and mistakes.

Stew said...

All difficult things to let go of in deed.
But the future has so much more potential when we learn from these things and let them go.